Cook'em low and cook'em slow...

This is a common saying that is often heard when referring to the preferred method of cooking ribs. To get the best tasting and most tender ribs, you should cook them at low heat at a very slow rate. For me personally, I bake them (if I don’t have a smoker) for three hours at 200 or 250 degrees and then brown them up on the grill.

I was reminded of this saying as I was reading Archbishop Timothy Dolan’s book Priests for the Third Millennium. I have read this book each summer for the past three years. I first read it while I was discerning applying for seminary. Then I read it as I was preparing for my first year in seminary and now I read it again as I prepare to begin my second year.

The fourth chapter of the book talks about the virtue of humility and how it is an essential virtue for a priest to have. Archbishop Dolan, in speaking about priestly formation in particular and growth in holiness in general, mentions that we need to have more of a “crock pot” approach rather than a “microwave” approach. That is, we must realize that we are not in control of our own salvation. We do not grow in holiness by the things that we do. To think that we can merit our own salvation by the things we do and therefore do not need a savior would make us Pelagians. Another trap in our growth in humility is pragmatism. Pragmatism basically involves us priding ourselves on our practicality and getting things done. It is a focus on doing rather than believing.

I must admit that in various situations in my life I have struggled to be humble. Outwardly at times I may display what people see as humility but in my heart I still have a somewhat pragmatic approach. I tend to try and put everything in order. I love checklists and seeing my progress by looking at what I have done. In seminary, my grades (wrongfully so) became the indicator to me that I was doing the right thing. I was so focused on “doing”, that I lost track of “being.”

Perhaps the greatest test of my patience and my willingness to submit to the will of God has involved my house. God willing, I will close on the sale of my house in two days. Anyone who knows me well knows what an enormous amount of stress this has been for me. I never doubted that in the end God’s will would be done. The part that I struggled with is that it wasn’t happening on my time table. At one point I received an offer on my house and I was tempted to take it. I struggled for a couple of days before finally discerning that it was not the right time. My house was on the market for fifteen months (almost ten months with lots of showings but no offer) and only sold when I resolved myself to accept God’s will and pray for his assistance. It is somewhat ridiculous that it took me that long to realize it.

There are other parts of my life where I tend to want things done on my timetable. I want to see conversion in people sooner. I want to know that my words to them and the love I show them have an effect. I want to see the effects of my actions. I even came up with a name for this type of behavior “Boomerang ministry.” Most of us can remember playing with a boomerang at some point in our life. We throw it out knowing that it is designed to come back to us. I don’t know about you but I was never successful in having it come back to me. I was quite happy to conclude that there was something wrong with the boomerang. I was unwilling to admit that it took practice, technique, and letting go of unrealistic expectations before I would ever have the boomerang come back.

I bring all of this up because I think the same thing applies to our spiritual lives and our paths to holiness. I get quite frustrated at times when I find myself battling the same sins, the same temptations, or simply having a bad attitude. I want to be holy and I and want it now! I get frustrated when I feel like I don’t have the prayer life that I think I should have or the one that I want. I get frustrated when I feel like I have not made the progress in my path to holiness that I should.

Obviously, I need a good dose of humility. I need to submit myself to the “crock pot” style that is seminary formation. And I need to remember the words of this past Sunday’s gospel and learn to go away to quiet places to pray and rest. Next Sunday’s gospel also has a good message (i.e. multiplication of the loaves). If I bring all that I have, and nothing less) to God and give myself over to him, he will have me recline and then will provide for me in abundance.

No one likes to admit their faults or encounter the areas where we need to grow, but I would like to encourage all of you to join me in this quest to adopt a “cook’em low and cook’em slow attitude.” Let’s not put God on our timetable. I am sure that what he has prepared for us will be worth the wait.

Pax Tecum,
Tom